Response to Simona's

Nice job, Simona! Also, great use of dialogue. When I first read it, I was slightly put off but I realized that it is really quite good and helps to further the story and also is the way you use to tell the story. Perhaps try to put a little more of your voice into it though so that you don’t get lose in all of the quotations. I think you have a great choice of topic here and something is certainly timely. How is the situation with migrant workers unique to Michigan? Is it even? What is your audience for your piece or where are you trying to pitch it? I think it’d be best in a large newspaper like the Detroit Free Press or a magazine. The quote that you end with is good but maybe try to end a little more definitively, the piece just sorta seems to abruptly end. Explaining a little more of what the migrant camps are may also help people who are not familiar with them. This has the makings of a great piece. Great job.